Continuing the Audio Teaching on Joyful Parenthood, Venerable Lama Dondrup Dorje explains the importance of taking refuge in those who know and not relying on our own emotional impulses in deciding how to act as parent. Giving several vivid examples, Ven. Lama Dondrup Dorje shows how decisions must be made with clear understanding of the long-term effects of what we do, to ensure it will be of benefit to our children in their later life. Parent should also learn to see things from the children’s point of view, and act with their welfare, rather than their own interest, in mind.
Explaining three things that children need in order to have a good relationship with their parents, Ven. Lama Dondrup Dorje encouraged parents to communicate their approval to children on correct behaviour and reprimand them when they have made mistakes, so that they will develop a clear understanding of what is acceptable behaviour and what is not; and the children must also be made aware that their parents, while may not always endorse certain conduct they may subscribe, will always love them and will never abandon them regardless what error they may have committed.
To cultivate proper relationship between parents and children requires the presence of right view to serve as a bridge of communication between parents and children. This can only be possible if the parents are already familiar with the right view themselves. Right view comes to those who take refuge in the teachings of Lord Buddha who has attained the ultimate realisation of the true nature of both phenomenon and reality. To follow the guidance of such an Awakened One will improve not merely the quality of relationships between parents and their children but will also benefit the relationship they have with anyone they come to contact in daily life.
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